Who is that woman?  She is more than her visual image.

She’s smack dab in the middle of midlife

She is a woman that is in her 50’s with a lot more living to do.  She has dreams to fulfill, goals to achieve, new things to learn, places to visit,  people to help, relationships to nurture and a life to live with purpose.


I know her better than anyone else, other than her Creator.  I know every event in her life that has brought her to this minute.  The moments of happiness, tears, joys, disappointments, laughter, disagreements, hopes and dreams.

She has reached a point in her life where she has more freedom and is looking internally at what is her purpose during this season of life.

Do you recognize the woman you see in the mirror?

Is that woman happy?  Is she living her best life?  Is she spending time on things that fill her up, or drain her?  Is she living a life of purpose? Maybe she’s feeling restless?

Past Experiences:

Our past experiences do help shape us into who we are; however, they do not have to define us, unless we choose to let them. I understand many have lived through some very difficult life situations and have come away from them with feelings of inadequacy, not being worthy, betrayal, abandonment, anger, etc.

I have seen people deal with those feelings and choose to move forward in a positive way.  They have chosen forgiveness to bring peace to their life.  I have also seen people choose to live, and relive, past hurts, choosing to numb the pain of rejection or hurt, and rehash past events to anyone that would listen.

For me, I let a lot of my past experiences guide me.

I feel very fortunate to have been raised in the family I was raised in, but there are instances where I have changed to be true to myself and my desires.


angry woman in the mirror
Not really happy with the woman in the mirror

Do you like the woman in the mirror?

I will admit there are times that I don’t like the woman in the mirror.  I don’t like a thought I have, a comment I’ve shared, a choice I’ve made, or a physical flaw.  If I dwell on those negative things, I can be an unhappy and miserable person.

My modus operandi (MO) is to disengage from relationships with people that drain me and are not open to change.  Since I’m not able to get away from myself, it’s important that I make some changes when I’m not particularly happy with myself.


you are who you are
You’re stuck with you, so make changes so you like you!

What is her future

Sometimes it is just doing the next thing.  That is her future….doing the next thing.

If you’re not really liking what you see and ready to make a change, then do it.  If you’re not sure how to do it, I’m going to be sharing some suggestions in the upcoming weeks and I hope you join me.

Maybe you aren’t where you want to be, and that’s ok!  You can change that.

If you’re like me, you might be waiting until everything is perfectly planned out so you can carry out that plan gracefully.  Sometimes we can’t do things neatly, or gracefully, sometimes it’s messy.  We must push through that mess knowing that we’ll come out on the other side feeling better about who we are and liking that woman in the mirror.

Until next time…..

Remember that YOU are a beautiful and unique creation. YOU are loved and are worthy of love.


The woman in the mirror’s future is up to her!


Midlife woman smiling at her reflection in the mirror
Goal: To love and like that woman in the mirror

20 Comments on Who is that woman in the mirror?

  1. I love who we are becoming! I don’t believe there has been a time our “pause” has been so celebrated with hopes and dreams. Gen-X is changing “the changes.” 💞

    • You ALWAYS hit a close-to-my-heart spot when you write articles and posts. (I have teared up a couple times because you hit open wounds, albeit with love. ❤️ I’m going to have to mull over everything you’ve said here before I can give my best answer. My knee jerk response is that I admire the woman I see in the mirror. But I want to launch her into doing and being soooooo much more than she is right now. This person is shedding chains of responsibility. ***Yes, She knows Rome wasn’t built in a day. 😊*** In case I have not told you lately, you matter in my small world. THANK YOU. ❤️

      • Yes!! We can love ourselves, but then to truly like ourselves and admire ourselves, etc is something different. Are we living up to our full potential?? You have big things you’re working towards. Keep the focus and don’t let things/life distract you. YOU matter in my world too. So appreciate your willingness to talk and share.

  2. Oh I love this, Melanie! Thank you for the encouragement and reminders – you bring a beam of hope! I had a chuckle this morning, someone had posted about “aging gracefully and sometimes “disgracefully” – isn’t it the truth! I love your mirror images! I will be stewing on that and I can’t wait for your future posts on this subject!

    • lol…thank you for sharing that chuckle with me this morning, Amy! We can try and try to age gracefully, but we’re not perfect, right? We do have it in us to get back on the right track though:)
      Xx Melanie

  3. Melanie,

    What a wonderful post today!
    I like the woman I see in the mirror but she’s not perfect. Flaws and wrinkles are who I am.
    Making mistakes are wonderful life lessons that I have learned from and made myself better for it.
    I look forward to reading more of your suggestions for self-love and self-respect!


    • Thank you, Robin! At this stage in our life, we’ve probably made plenty of mistakes. You’re a great example of accepting who you see and learning and growing from mistakes:)

  4. This is such a nice post. I actually like getting older probably because I had brain surgery at 29 and every year is such a blessing. I’m also thankfully a daughter and granddaughter to women who always looked amazing and led full, exciting lives. They never had issues with age and that definitely impacted the way I feel. My mom is 73 now and so incredible and my grandmother is 98! The things you shared here about past experience and wisdom gained are wonderful.

    xx Jenifer

    • Jenifer:
      Going through what you went through definitely puts a different perspective on life

      BTW, my mom is 78 and my grandma is 98 too! It sounds like we’ve both had some great examples in our lives <3

  5. Very interesting article, I enjoyed reading, it really is true that you wait for the perfect time to make a decision when everything is perfect; sometimes things do not necessarily turn out the way you want it and you must take the bull by the horn and take action where necessary in order to pave way for positive change.

  6. It is so important for us to take a look in the mirror from time to time and take stock of our lives. It is especially important at this point in our lives when we are in transition, our kids are flying the nest and we have to reevaluate our purpose if we have been stay at home moms. We can be so much more than we had thought, all that is holding us back is ourselves.

    • Love that Mary and totally agree. If “it” enters our mind, I believe there is a way we can make “it” happen! Thank you for stopping by!

  7. I think I’m a little of both, not always happy, but also not always restless…definitely a much harder time in my life than I imagined. Thought as the kids grew life would slow down and at times I feel the opposite, thanks for sharing your perspective, I’ll definitely be following along!!

    • I understand you, Lisa. You sound like where I was a few years ago. It didn’t slow down as the kids got older and it hasn’t slowed down as they have flown the coop either. Sooooo mamy things to do:)
      Xx Melanie

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